Frog Legs
by landofthekwt
Summary: Stories about Jaken. Don't own it. Don't profit from it.
1. A Bit of Fluff

Title: A Bit of Fluff

Author: landofthekwt

Rating M

Genre: Romance/Unrequited Love

Universe: Canon

Word Count: 407

Pairing: Jaken/Lord Sesshoumaru(unrequited love), Jaken/mokomoko-sama

Warning: wet dreams, yaoi squick Inuyasha Fanfic Week 161/ Non Canon Pairings

Summary: Jaken has a wet dream.

A/N The genesis of this piece was discussion I had with salomewilde about Jaken's relation to Lord Sesshoumaru.

It had been love at first sight. Lord Sesshoumaru was everything anyone could want in a youkai.

He radiated power. His ambition knew no bounds. To Jaken he was the most beautiful thing that he had ever seen. He had allowed Jaken to follow him and entrusted him with the Staff of Two Heads. When he battled the panther demons, only Jaken was allowed to fight with him. He had insisted that Jaken accompany him to seek out Naraku at Mount Hakerei. Surely, that was love.

Jaken lived for any scrap from Lord Sesshoumaru. An angry word. A savage beating. Anything to acknowledge his presence. He knew that he would never be allowed to touch Lord Sesshoumaru. So he took solace in touching something that touched his Lord.

He had developed a peculiar attachment to mokomoko-sama. When Lord Sesshoumaru flew he held onto it for dear life. At night he would sleep on it. It was so warm, so fluffy. It seemed to wrap itself around him. Most of all it surrounded him with his masters scent.When he was sleeping on mokomoko-sama at night, he could imagine that he was with his lord.

In his dreams he would ride the three legged beast. He would luxuriate in warm soft fur of his master. Somehow he knew that his master loved him. If he could prove worthy to his master maybe someday his master would return his love.

One night his dreams took an erotic turn. Lord Sesshoumaru lay before him naked. He crooked his finger bidding Jaken to come to him. It was the moment what he had always dreamed. of

As mokomoko-sama wrapped itself around Jaken, he knew that he finally achieved Nirvana. Nothing in his life could equal the ecstasy he felt at this moment. He was surrounded in warm fluffy goodness. At last Lord Sesshoumaru would be his forever.

When Jaken reached his climax, he screamed those words that he had been longing to say.

"Lord Sesshoumaru, make me your love monkey!"

Something was wrong. Lord Sesshoumaru was fading. There was only mokomoko-sama wrapped around him. When he looked up Rin and Lord Sesshoumaru were standing over him.

Rin squealed " Look. Lord Sesshoumaru, Jaken made mokomoko-sama all wet and sticky."

Jaken quailed in fear. He knew what was coming next. As he lapsed into unconsciousness, his last thoughts were that he would endure any hardship to be with his Lord.


	2. All my children

Title : All my children

Author: landofthekwt

Rating: PG

Universe: Canon

Word Count: 715

Pairing: N/A

Genre: General

Warning: Birth and Death. Inuyasha Fan Fic Week 147.- Parent & Child Theme

A/N No copyright infringement of the TV show "All my children" is not intended. Any similarity to any Futurama episode is purely coincidental . The author does not profit in any manner from this fanfiction. Inuyasha et al belong to Rumiko the corporations who own or hold rights to their use

Summary: Jaken has puppies

.

Gods , what an annoyance. The same thing happened every two hundred years. He had been very careful to hide his condition. Rin would no doubt laugh at him. Lord Sesshoumaru would simply raise an questioning eyebrow. His condition had never occurred while in the service of his is possible that he did not know what was wrong. But then Lord Sesshoumaru did know everything.

The big day finally came. He needed to get away from the castle. as soon as possible. The swamp where he was born was many days away on foot. There was only one way to get there in time. He would have to borrow Ah-Un. But it must be in secret. The Lord must never know. It was burden so humiliating that if Lord Sesshoumaru were to learn of it he would shamed forever.

And so he crept into the stable where Ah-Un was kept. The horse dragon seemed curious why the imp was saddling and muzzling him at this time of night. However, Jaken had prepared for this eventuality and brought some nice juicy grass to distract the dragon. Ah-Un did seem to be appeased. Jaken put on the saddle and muzzle with some difficulty. He took the reins and turned the dragon around. There in the doorway was Lord Sesshoumaru. Jaken became a quivering mass of jelly.

" Where are you taking Ah-Un" asked the tai-yoikai in a strident voice.

Jaken finally stammered. "My lord, I need to take care of a condition . I t can only be taken care of at my home swamp."

Lord Sesshoumaru considered the answer for a moment and responded. " Just see that you bring Ah-Un back in one piece by morning.".

Jaken was so relieved that he did not stop to think that Lord Sesshoumaru might for a moment know what was happening. He was just glad to get out of the castle and to finish this task.

After several hours of flying Ah-Un finally reached the swamp where Jaken was born. It was wonderful to see his home again. It was here that he had survived the long childhood years.

It was here that he had begun the trek towards leadership in his had abandoned his home, his clan and his people to follow his lord. The smell of the swampbrought back all the memories. The one memory he did not have was of a parent. None of his kind remembered their parents. His children would not remember when he left. Sometimes he wondered what had happened to the previous generation that he had spawned. Such thoughts were foolishness. They would never know him and he would never know them.

Ah-Un set down where Jaken has asked him to. He found the dragon grass to eat while he did his duty. He disrobed and laid his staff by the waters edge. Gingerly, he tested the muck. It was as warm and gooey as he remembered.

He waded out into the water. It would not be long now. Without the staff and in his condition he was vulnerable. All he could do was wait.

After several hours of sitting in the water the boils on his back began to itch. He knew that he must resist the urge to scratch. If he did he risked injuring his precious offspring. He must be patient.

At last he felt the film which covered the boils on his back began to be punctured. It was happening. He screamed in pain Unfortunately, there was no one to hear him and he alone was responsible for his condition. His only refuge was that the process took place naturally without any overt thought of procreation.

By now many little creatures who looked somewhat similar to tadpoles had been released from their birth parent and were already swimming away from. Jaken knew that they would have a tough task ahead merely to survive. Most would not. Those who did survive would continue his species of demon.

This thought gave him a moment of pride. He was after all the father and mother of a new generation of imps. He wished them well. Wistfully, he thought about his children as he waded back to shore. Perhaps they would remember him fondly.. Perhaps,,,,

He felt a squish as something oozed between his toes.

Oops.


	3. Protector of the Sacred Jewel

Title: Protector of the Sacred Jewel

Author: landofthekwt

Genre: Absurd

Universe: Canon

Word Count: 474

Rating: G

Warning: Spoiler for Chapter 27 : Inuyasha Fanfic Week 155:Jewelry

Summary: Jaken tries to protect the Sacred Jewel in the modern era disguised as a middle school boy.

Jaken stared at his watch. He had been waiting for this ridiculous ningen woman for over an hour. She had told him that she would meet him at theater. Didn't she have the good sense to be on time. It never occurred to Jaken that she might have forgotten their date.

Jaken could not understand why he had been thrust into the duty of being her protector. Surely, this was a job more suitable for some more menial underling of Lord Sesshoumaru's than himself. Why did he have to pretend to be a middle school boy merely to watch over this wench. It was such an indignity to have be around a whole school of these inferior beings day after day simply to protect one girl. who happened to possess shards of the sacred jewel.

Wasn't the job of protecting this girl supposed to be Inuyasha's job. The worthless hanyou should have survived to this century to protect the girl. instead of dying. Instead Jaken had to do his job.

Lord Sesshoumaru had only known about the girl's origins because Inuyasha informed him about it as he was dying. Somehow the hanyou had gotten Lord Sesshoumaru to swear that he would protect her. Of course Lord Sesshoumaru was too busy to handle this duty himself. Instead he had committed this task to his trusted servant. Jaken would not fail him.

Jaken had actually surprised Lord Sesshoumaru by his performance of this assignment. He received top marks. His physical prowess was legendary. His popularity among the students was overwhelming.

What boggled Lord Sesshoumaru's mind was Jaken's success with human females. All of the females seemed to be attracted to him. The disguise which was supposed to allow Jaken to blend in had been too good. He constantly had to fend off female admirers.

Jaken was shell shocked by the flirtatious human females. His species reproduced by budding. The idea of sexual intercourse nauseated him beyond belief. Three of the wenches friends had pressured him to ask Kagome for a date. This idea fit into his plans of protecting her.

But as he stood outside the theater he became more and more nervous. What if she tried to hold hands or kiss him or engage in sexual intercourse. He shook at the thought. It was horrible even to contemplate.

After two hours he finally realized that she was not coming. He was relieved until he realized that he would have to explain to Lord Sesshoumaru how he had lost track of the human girl with the sacred jewel shards. He would get a beating for sure. If only he had remembered to use the staff of two heads to kill her in the Inu-no-taisho's grave none of this cloak and dagger to protect her and the sacred jewel would be necessary.


	4. Clean Up

Title: Clean Up

Author: landofthekwt

Rating: PG-13

Prompt: Backpack ( Inuyasha Fan Fic Week 184)

Universe: Canon (modern)

Word Count:557

Warning Innuendo

Summary: Jaken cleans up after Kagome

God, he hated his job. He should never have followed Lord Sesshoumaru. It had been bad enough in the Sengoku Jidai. Playing baby sitter for Rin. Getting stepped on by Inuyasha.

Now the jobs he did were simply demeaning. If the cesspool needed cleaning, he was handed a a dignitary needed a ride, he was handed a chauffeur's hat. No job was considered beneath his dignity.

Lord Sesshoumaru would simply look at him with that icy demeanor and order him to do whatever needed doing. Jaken would stutter, bow and cower in fear. It never even occurred to him to refuse his Lords orders.

Today's order had been particularly humiliating. Twenty-first century litter had been reported in archeological sites in Musashi. Now he was a trash collector cleaning up after that infuriating girl.

In today's world there were signs telling people not to litter. Yet this woman brought every kind of junk food imaginable from this world into the Sengoku Jidai in that stupid yellow backpack of hers. Then instead of carting it out with her, she had simply tossed her trash out wherever she camped.

Somewhere in his wisdom Lord Sesshoumaru decided to hide the fact that someone from the twenty first century had been present in the Warring States Era. Naturally, it was Jaken's job to clean after Kagome.

He checked his gear. His concealment was in place. He had his trash bag and his pointy stick. His credentials were all in order. He even had the uniform of an Imperial Park Ranger complete with hat, badge and whistle.

There was chaos when he arrived at the site. A mixture of officialdom, archeologists, press and curiosity seekers were milling around the site.

Not good at all. He had arrived too late. Lord Sesshoumaru would have his head for sure.

Where was the staff of two heads when you needed it? In those days you could incinerate humans at your leisure with no questions asked. Today there would be endless investigation and inquiries. Eventually, Lord Sesshoumaru would bribe the right people and it would all go away. But it was up to good old Jaken to clean it up.

Jaken heard a sound behind him. Turning around he saw Lord Sesshoumaru emerge from the underbrush half naked followed by that giggling panther demon trollop from the steno pool.

Jaken lowered his eyes.

" Jaken, I need you to create a diversion. When you are done cleaning up this site, take the rest of the day off."

Jaken gulped "Yes, my Lord."

He turned and charged into the pack of humans with his pointed stick acting like a lance. The humans scattered like chaff before him.

" This site is now closed for cleaning by Order of the Imperial Parks Department. All persons are to clear the area immediately"

There was much grumbling, but eventually they all left. Jaken was able to finish the cleanup just before sunset. Lord Sesshoumaru, of course, had been joking about taking the rest of the day off. He still was responsible for disposing of the trash left by that woman.

Many hours later, he was back in front of his TV set in the cellar of Lord Sesshoumaru's estate snoring away with a bottle of sake in his hand. Another glorious day in the service of his Lord.


	5. Cringe

Title: Cringe

Author: landofkwt

Rating: PG-13

Prompt: Cringe (Issekiwa Week 88)

Word Count: 188

Genre: Toadies

Warning: None

Summary: Master Jaken speaks

" If this idea does not work, you will pay with your life, Jaken."

Cringe

" Lord Sesshoumaru wastes nothing on sentiment. I could have been killed with the oni."

Cringe

" Please do not smile, Lord Sesshoumaru. ( I fear my life has been shortened a hundred years.)."

Cringe

" Did you really test that sword on me, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Cringe

" I shall follow you to the ends of the earth Lord Sesshoumaru (Even though I may end up dying)"

Cringe

"Lord Sesshoumaru, don't leave me behind."

Cringe

"If anything happens to Rin, Lord Sesshoumaru will kill me."

Cringe

" I may just die if I follow Lord Sesshoumaru any further."

Cringe

"Are you pretending to be dead, Jaken?"

Cringe

" I should have followed my mother's advice and been a boatman."

Cringe

" Lord Sesshoumaru, why is Jaken twitching and moaning in his sleep?"

Sesshoumaru stared at Jaken then turned and walked out of the camp

"Come, Rin"

Rin skipped happily after him " Hurry up, Master Jaken or you will be left behind"


	6. Zamaamiyagare

Title: Zamaamiyagare (They got what they deserved)

Author: landofthekwt

Rating: PG-13

Prompt: Might (Issekiwa Week 92)

Word Count:250

Genre: Justice Sesshoumaru style

Warning: non-character deaths

Summary: Jaken considers his own future as he carries out Sesshouumaru's orders

Sesshoumaru really did not intend to kill the man. He was merely looking for a boat and the man just happened to be in the way. When the samurai persisted in annoying him, he simply walked to the boat and told Jaken to take care of things.

As Jaken burned the samurai with the staff of two heads, he had no sympathy for them. If they had left when Lord Sesshoumaru ordered them to leave they could have lived. Instead, they would be scorch marks on the earth within seconds. What fools they were To have the temerity to defy Lord Sesshoumaru. They got what they deserved.

Humans would never learn. The only way of avoiding death at Lord Sesshoumaru's hand was to stay out of his way and not annoy him. He had long ago learned this painful lesson. If he annoyed Lord Sesshoumaru or failed him in any respect he would find himself in the same position as the samurai.

While he felt some joy in taking out his frustration on the samurai, he knew that he was next. The staff which had led them to this location had not found the tomb. Somehow he knew that Lord Sesshoumaru would blame him for this failure.

Unless he did some quick thinking, he would join the samurai. While the samurai may have gotten what they deserved, he would like to think that he deserved more than that grisly fate for all his years of devoted service to his Lord.


	7. Coming Up Short

Title Coming Up Short

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Tease (Inuyasha Themes #39)

Word Count 250

Genre Altitude Impaired Toads

Warning none

Summary Rin cheer up Jaken

"Little Youkai"

It seemed as if everyone was calling him "Short" despite his protestations to contrary. Even the old miko was calling him "Little Youkai" and the taijiya was agreeing with her. Even Rin was not defending him.

It was all Inuyasha's fault. The miko stopped him from stepping on him saying she had to protect the little ones. When he protested, Rin agreed with the miko that he was in fact short.

Lord Sesshoumaru had never called him short. If only he would return all of the name calling would. come to a halt. He would not allow Inuyasha to stretch him to make him. Taller Things just could not get any worse.

Just when he was at his lowest point, Rin summoned him outside where Shippou and Kirara were standing. She motioned for him to stand beside Shippou. He complied wondering what she was doing.

"See Master Jaken. You are tallest."

Indeed he was the taller than the kitsune or nekomata. He strutted off with the staff of two heads in his hands. ready to take on all who dared to call him short. When he was out of sight, Rin handed a fish to Kirara and pocky to Shippou which she had liberated from Kagome's backpack.

"Thank you, Kirara and Shippou for helping me make Master Jaken feel better about himself."

"I know what it is liked to be belittled. For pocky I would make even Jaken feel better." Kirara mewed in agreement.. .


	8. Good Luck Charm

Title Good Luck Charm

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Luck (Unsung Heroes)

Word Count 298

POV Jaken

Warning None

Summary Jaken explains his value to Sesshoumaru

" What exactly do you do for Lord Sesshoumaru, Master Jaken?" asked Rin as she helped Jaken out of the mud into he had been thrown by Ah-Un on his arrival in the village.

Jaken sputtered " I will have you know that Lord Sesshoumaru was so impressed by my prowess in battle that he asked me to leave my army to accompany him"

Rin looked awed:" Really?" Jaken neglected to tell her that Sesshoumaru had saved him from certain death when they met.

Jaken puffed himself up knocking over the staff of two heads and setting the nearest hut ablaze in the process. " It was under my tutelage that Lord Sesshoumaru exceeded his father" He added "If he had lived." .

Rin looked impressed. What Jaken did not tell her that the reason that the reason that Lord Sesshoumaru had not fought the dragon with his father was that on the way to Musashi Jaken had fallen off his youki cloud and had to be rescued.

" I was given the task of locating Tessaiga. I was the one who discovered that Inuyasha was the key to obtaining the sword. My plan worked perfectly."

"Isn't Tessaiga Lord Inuyasha's sword?"

"Only after Lord Sesshoumaru allowed him to use it to save himself from his youkai blood."

"Didn't Lord Sesshoumaru lose his arm fighting Inuyasha?"

"Sesshoumaru merely wanted to show that he did not need his arm or his father's sword to become a daiyoukai."

Rin beamed. Jaken really was magnificent. To think that Lord Sesshoumaru owed everything to Jaken. Kaede who had been listening to them turned to Lord Sesshoumaru.

"Why exactly did you allow Jaken to accompany you?"

Sesshoumaru shrugged " My father once told me that kappas were lucky."


	9. The Short Straw

Title The Short Straw

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Short (issekiwa)

Genre Coming Up Short

Word Count 201

Warning none

Summary How Jaken met Sesshoumaru

Jaken stared at his straw. It couldn't be. After all the time and effort he had put into leading his people he could not come up with the short straw.

His people had sacrificing people to the Inugami from time immemorial. Jaken had thought to make the method of choosing the sacrifice more fair.

Everyone would pick a straw. The one choosing the short straw would be the sacrifice. No one had been exempted. It never occurred to him that he would be the sacrifice.

All his fellows had deserted him. No one wanted to be around when the beast appeared. There were rumors. Although no one had actually seen the beast, no one had ever returned

At the stroke of midnight the beast appeared, a dog as tall a building with dokkasou dripping from its mouth and claws. Jaken shriveled in terror.

The beast dwindled to a tall man in white robes with fur over his shoulder. He motioned for Jaken to follow him. When they reached a waterfall, the man tossed a staff to Jaken.

"Follow me. I hope you last longer than the other sacrifices. It is so much trouble breaking in a new toadie every year."


	10. Don't Stop Believing

Title Don't Stop Believing

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Modesty (Inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 250

Genre introspection

Warning none

Summary Jaken suffers for his Lord

As he stuck to the bottom of Inuyasha's foot, he had to keep repeating his mantra. Someday when Lord Sesshoumaru establishes his kingdom, 'I will be his chief minister'. Then everything he had gone through for Lord Sesshoumaru would be worth it..

He had to keep believing in Lord Sesshoumaru no matter what. Whenever he lost faith the kitsune and Rin were there to point out that he had given up. He was lucky Lord Sesshoumaru had not killed him for his lack of faith.

Despite these failings Lord Sesshoumaru had not made a move to replace him. Where Lord Sesshoumaru went he went. Though at the moment he had no clue where Lord Sesshoumaru was.

The others might blame Lord Sesshoumaru for leaving them. He would never do so. Lord Sesshoumaru must have a reason for leaving him with Rin, Kohaku and Ah-Un when Naraku attacked

Maybe Lord Sesshoumaru was testing him. If so he had passed with flying colors. It was due to his efforts alone that Naraku had been repelled. At least that is what he would tell Lord Sessshoumaru.

As Inuyasha pulled him off the bottom of his foot and tried to stretch him back into shape by pulling on his head and his feet., Jaken could only send out a silent prayer to Lord Sesshoumaru.

"Please Lord Sesshoumaru, come back soon. Your humble servant may be able deal with Naraku,but your brother might accidently kill me if you don't return"


	11. Rain Dance

Title Rain Dance

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Sunshower (Inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 240

Warning none

Summary Jaken watches Rin dance in the rain

Rin had finally lost her mind. Jaken was sure of it. What other human would cavort about in the rain, whooping and hollering as each drop of rain touched her face.

Lord Sesshoumaru seemed oblivious to it all. He sat at the mouth of the cave smoking his pipe and staring into the clouds as if waiting for a sign. At least he had the sense to stay out of the rain..

Jaken blinked. Rin was now standing with her arms spread wide, mouth open gazing at the clouds. He was sure that she had finally snapped. Unless something was done, she would stare into space, mouth agape until she drowned, like some small turkey.

Then Jaken saw the light. The heavens opened and the sun was revealed. Rin was bathed in sunshine and rain. Jaken rubbed his eyes. For a moment colors swirled around Rin until then they formed a rainbow where Rin had been.

Just as suddenly the rain stopped and Rin just stood in the rain wet and bedraggled. Jaken heard Lord Sesshoumaru stirring and knew that he was headed for trouble. Lord Sesshoumaru looked at Rin and then at Jaken.

"Jaken. Rin is wet. Dry her off and we will be on our way."

Jaken stared at Lord Sesshoumaru. He may just have escaped a beating. Too late he missed the rock aimed at his head. Stunned, he heard his master's voice saying " Now, Jaken"


	12. A Toad's Life

Title A Toad's Life

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Handler (ib4y)

Word Count 300

Warning none

Summary The life of a manager is sometimes unrewarding

Jaken looked at his watch. Lord Sesshoumaru was late again. The DJ's were staring at him while at the same time they were trying to fill air time which should have been devoted to the greatest rock star of this era.

Once these promos would not have been necessary, but the arenas were now only half-full. He hated to blame Lord Sesshoumaru, but the summary cancellation of tour events on the whim of the daiyoukai over the years had eroded the fan base.

The cell phone text signal buzzed. Jaken winced as he read the damage report from the hotel and the police report from last night's party. He wired funds to the hotel and notified their lawyer to do damage control.

Just as he despaired about Lord Sesshoumaru, the man himself breezed with Rin and Kagome on either arm. Rin in her Lolita costume while Kagome was dressed in green hot pants and a white tube top.

These were Lord Sessshoumaru's latest conquests. So many women. So many dollars to pay them off. It was not Jaken's place to make moral judgments merely to put out the fires Lord Sesshoumaru set.

The interview actually went rather well. Lord Sesshoumaru actually seemed interested in the questions. As he was leaving the studio, Lord Sesshoumaru stopped in front of Jaken as if wanting to say something.

They all waited. Jaken hoping that Lord Sesshoumaru would finally thank him for all that he did for him. Finally, Lord Sesshoumaru spoke to Jaken "Don't I know you?"

Jaken replied:"I am your faithful servant, Jaken, Lord Sesshoumaru"

Sesshoumaru paused as if trying to remember " When I was a boy, my father gave me a toad by that name for my one hundredth birthday. I always wondered what happened to him"


	13. Old Flames

Title Old Flames

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Flame

Genre General

Warning none

Summary Inuyasha sends Kagome to Sesshoumaru for her own safety

The major domo was beside himself. What was he going to do with this woman that Lord Sesshoumaru dumped on his doorstep without any indication of her status?

He finally coaxed the young woman into telling her story. She was the wife of the Lord's half brother. He had sent her and her children to safety with Jaken when he had taken Rin out of the burning village.

Until it was clear if her husband was alive or dead. Kagome and her children would room with the women's quarters with the rest of the consorts and their children


	14. Chief Cook and Bottle Washer

Title Chief Cook and Bottle Washer

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Tossing and Turning (Inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 650

Warning none

Summary Jaken finds a place for Kagome and Rin as chief cook and bottle washer

Jaken tossed and turned in his bed. He had found a place for Kagome and Rin in the woman's quarters. Normally that would have been the end of it. Unfortunately, the chief cook and bottle washer had quit claiming that Jaken had verbally abused them.

Lord Sesshoumaru would return soon. He would have his head if learned that the castle no longer had a cook. Searching through the many consorts and ladies of the court that Lord Sesshoumaru had collected over the years, he found that they all had one thing in common. None of them knew how to cool

Somehow they thought that as noble women, cooking was beneath them. It was something that only servants did. They could read and recite poetry. Fold paper cranes by the thousands. Play court politics better than any man. Unfortunately for Jaken they could not cook.

He was about to despair of his life when he remembered something from his days watching Rin in the Sunset Village. Kagome, the former miko and wife of Inuyasha claimed to be able to cook. Although he had never eaten any of her cooking, he was desperate enough to hire her as a cook.

Kagome was hesitant at first. She had only cooked for her family. Never for an entire castle. Jaken made it sound like a threat. Would he really evict her and her children, if she did not cook?

In the end it was Rin who brought her around. Rin was ecstatic about being in Lord Sesshoumaru's castle. If being bottle washer would help Lord Sesshoumaru she was game. She convinced Kagome that she could do it. Rin had always been so quiet in the village. Her enthusiasm in the face of disaster swept all of Kagome's doubts away.

The two devoted themselves to the task at hand. There were rumblings from within the castle. Food no better than slop. How dare they set human food before us. Dish breakage was at an all time high. Jaken could no longer find a complete set of dishes anywhere in the castle.

When Lord Sesshoumaru returned., Jaken knew that it was make or break time. He would have to serve the Lord personally and take his chances. The Lord was usually quiet after he had eaten, Jaken dismayed the rest of the staff and awaited his Lord's verdict. Finally, the great man spoke.

"What is this,Jaken?"

"I believe the miko called it ramen?"

"The same ramen that my brother eats morning, noon and night"

"I believe so, Lord Sesshoumaru"

"And you thought that such swill was fit to serve me."

"It seems to be what the miko cooks best."

Lord Sesshoumaru pondered this statement. "Why is the miko cooking food for the castle?"

Jaken squirmed " Because the chief cook and bottle washer quit and I could not find another willing to replace her."

Lord Sesshoumaru looked sternly at Jaken "Why is that?"

Jaken shrugged hopelessly " I don't know. If Rin had not agreed to be bottle washer, Kagome would never have accepted the position."

Lord Sesshoumaru growled "Rin is washing bottles?"

Jaken looked for an exit "Breaking most of them actually"

"And you thought that it was good idea to put a woman who cannot cook in change of the castle's kitchen and force Rin to wash dishes."

Jaken did not like the direction that this discussion was taking. It seemed certain to end badly for him. "I guess not."

Lord Sesshoumaru smiled at Jaken. "You will hire back the cook at double her former salary. You will become her bottle washer."

"What about the miko and Rin?"

"Hopefully, the miko's idiot husband will be coming for her soon"

"And Rin?"

"She will have your job of course. No matter what she does there, she can't break anything."

"But Lord Sesshoumaru"

"You like living,Jaken?"

"I will inform the cook of your offer, Lord Sesshoumaru"


	15. You Can't Go Home Again

Title You Can't Go Home Again

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Puddle (inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 245

Warning none

Summary Jaken goes home

He gazed at the puddle. To think he had once called this home. It seemed like a dream of another time.

So long ago he had gone away seeking power and glory. Captain of the legions of imps and then in a flash he had left it all behind to follow Lord Sesshoumaru.

He did not regret leaving home or leaving his followers for Lord Sesshoumaru. Every step on the way had seemed destined to lead to greater glory.

Even now he hoped that his Lord would establish his kingdom. He told himself that every day when he looked at himself in the puddle.

Now back at his home puddle, he wondered if it had all been worth it. Leaving behind hearth and home to pursue power and glory had its own set problems.

No family but Rin , Sesshoumaru and Ah-Un. No power. Merely basking in Lord Sesshoumaru's power. No children to carry on his legacy. No mate to comfort him.

In his reverie he did not notice the imps gathering around. Warily they crept toward him wondering what powerful lord had entered there midst. Finally someone spoke

"If it isn't that my good for nothing son, Jaken. Always too proud. Now he is come home tail between his legs. We have rented your room. Begone before we sick the dogs on you."

Jaken suddenly remembering why he had left home. Better to Lord Sesshoumaru's toadie than a big frog in this misbegotten puddle.


	16. Prey

Title Prey

Author landofkwt

Prompt Squeak (inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 240

Warning none

Summary Jaken the mighty hunter

Jaken crept stealthily through the marsh using long forgotten techniques as he approached the dragon fly. It wasn't hunger that drew him to the hunt. It was the hunt itself. The thrill of stalking and devouring prey

He had not felt this thrilled since he entered Lord Sesshoumaru's service. As a vassal, a certain civility was expected of him by his Lord. He could not revert to his animal ways when at any moment his Lord would expect him to do something for him.

Lord Sesshoumaru was not here. Ah-Un was guarding Rin. It was the perfect opportunity to let down his hair so to speak and he wanted to make the most of it. That dragonfly would not escape alive.

He reached out to snag the dragonfly from its perch when suddenly he felt himself tackled and submerged. Fighting for breath, he surfaced squawking only to see Rin and Ah-Un standing over him.

"Rin, what did you do that for?"

"Master Jaken. Rin and Ah-Un were bored. You were having so much fun. We just wanted to play too"

Jaken was about to berate her when suddenly his attention was drawn to the dragonfly which had landed on a nearby cattail. His eyes gleamed. The game was afoot. The prey tantalizing close.

Rin and Ah-Un too, saw the dragonfly. The chase began again. Dragonfly followed by imp, followed by child, followed by dragon. That dragon fly was going down.


	17. Where Do Babies Come From?

Title Where Do Babies Come From?

Author landofthekwt

Rating PG-13

Prompt Shell (Inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 250

Warning toad reproduction

Summary Jaken tells Rin the facts of life

Jaken sighed as he gazed over the swamp which had once been his home. Here is where he should have stayed. He should have mated a local girl. His children should have been spawned here.

He did not notice Rin standing behind him. Remembered what she said not at all. Somehow he answered her question nonetheless. If he had been in his right mind, he would have yelled at her. At the very least he would have run and hid from her. Instead replied to her query about where babies come from without thinking.

"During mating season, the females release their eggs. The males fertilize the eggs of their chosen mates. Together they become a tadpole. The mated pair watch over their children to prevent their destruction until they were old enough to protect themselves from predators."

Rin was in awe. Lord Sesshoumaru knew everything. Since he was not here, she would have to rely on Master Jaken. She hugged Jaken and hurried back to the village. Lord Sesshoumaru was always telling her to learn everything she could about being human. She could hardly wait to tell Lord Sesshoumaru what she had learned.

"Jaken"

Jaken knew that whenever he heard those words uttered from Lord Sesshoumaru's mouth that he was in grave danger. It was only after he awoke days later that he learned that he had been clobbered for telling Rin where babies come from. He should give up on his dreams, they like him always ended up trampled underfoot.


	18. Tadpole

Title Tadpole

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Brood or Brewed

Word Count 230

Pairing Rin/Jaken

Warning none

Summary Jaken take his daughter out for a swim

Nothing in his life ever prepared him for fatherhood. Until he mated Rin, the thought of caring for another being never occurred to him. He thought that he would spend all his life alone following after Lord Sesshoumaru.

Rin had surprised him with her furor. He had no clue that she even held affection toward him until they were halfway through the mating ceremony. Luckily his instincts took over for him and he was able to mark her as his.

He had grown to accept the changes in his life. No longer would he follow Lord Sesshoumaru without Rin by his side Being with Rin, every moment of every day. Now there was a new child to care for which took up most of Rin's waking hours.

The night belonged to him. Him and his new daughter. She might be a new born human by day, but by night she already had learned to swim. His time alone with her made him appreciate the gift that Rin had given him. He was surprised when Rin hugged him from behind

"So this is where you have taken our daughter. Why didn't you tell me? I wake up and find you both gone. Don't you realize that I want to share all aspects of our daughter's life, not just her human moments?. I love you, but don't ever shut me out again."


	19. Sharing the Fluff

Title Sharing the Fluff

Author landofthekwt

Rating K

Prompt Fluff (Inuyasha fanfic)

Word Count 250

Warning none

Summary Jaken shares mokomoko sama with Rin

Jaken stared at the little girl snuggled into mokomoko sama. The fluff seemed as almost alive as it coiled itself around her. It almost seemed to be taking indecent liberties with her. Liberties it had never taken with him.

Only this morning this girl had been road kill. Mauled to death by wolves. He assumed that Lord Sesshoumaru would simply walk away from her as he had so many other dead humans. Nothing at all special about her.

Lord Sesshoumaru surprised him by turning back and using Tenseiga to raise her from the dead. He was even more astonished by the tender way Lord Sesshoumaru held her as he watched life return to her body. It was first time that he had ever seen Lord Sesshoumaru surprised by anything.

When Lord Sesshoumaru walked away, she followed him without a second's hesitation. Jaken was so astonished that he nearly was left behind. He could not let this newly revived human girl take the place at Lord Sesshoumaru's side which had been his for so long.

When night fell, Lord Sesshoumaru dropped mokomoko-sama. Jaken had always slept there because it meant being close to Lord Sesshoumaru. Instead he found the little intruder in his place.

Lord Sesshoumaru said nothing and continued to look at the stars. The little girl rolled over in her sleep leaving room on mokomoko sama for Jaken. Jaken seized his opportunity. Even if meant sharing Lord Sesshoumaru, he was not prepared to surrender his place at his side to anyone.


End file.
